I think it's starting...

...to be a problem.




I keep zoning out and I'm not really paying attention.




 ...for example...




I wasn't really listening to the conversation between Matthew and Lauren on the way home from Madison's birthday party.  I knew they were talking, but I was thinking of what I might find when I got home.  Then Lauren said something that brought me back.  She assigned her 8th grade health class to write a list of their top 5 stresses.  Lauren said one of the girls came up to her desk and asked how to spell the word, "dying"?  Lauren told her and then asked why she needed to know.  She said her mother died last year, one day after her thirteenth birthday.




...and I then I zoned out again, thinking about how grateful I am that I have had my mother for so long.




...and then I was thinking that I'm still not ready...


...and then I wondered what I would do if I needed to tell her something next week, or next year and I go upstairs to tell her and she's not there...



... and then I thought that someone's life is never long enough for those who are loved...




...not yet...


...not today...